I dig Xenophon. Not sure how much potential it has as unisex, unless you or your partner or both were of some sort of non-white race, because then it would sound all exotic.

It wouldn't necessarily have to be a Greek though, I just personally think Greek philosophers had the coolest names.

You are considering naming your child Xenophon, but you are actually worried that it might sound funny for a girl if you were non-white?

Just by considering Xenophon or Anaximenes, you had convinced me that you have no concern for whether your child has a strange name.

If I were to pick out some names, I would go with 18th and 19th century philosophers: Friedrich, Soren, Immanuel, or Giambattista (last one is a bit of a joke).

I also thought it'd be cool to throughout the course of my life develop a bunch of crazy dense cryptic philosophies of my own, impart their meanings to my kid and name him Simplicius. That'd be kind of weird and selfish though, i guess.

Yea.... not to be too much of a party-pooper here, but in giving a name to a human, who'll carry it for the rest of their lives, there is a rather huge responsibility to not name them something that'll bring too much suffering. It's not just children who can be ruthless to someone with a strange name; it continues on, trust me.

This kid will become a walking joke for 12 years of school (and beyond)...don't do that!

"Oh, there goes Socrates, the great philosopher!"

[CENTER]Incontinentia Buttocks?[/CENTER]

A walking joke to whom? All of the stupid ignorant kids consumed with an unhealthy drive for normalcy and acceptance in a dissapointing society, who can't get past something as superficial as a name? And they would see him as a walking joke? I <3 the irony.

This is why I decided i'd give my kid a crazy name in the first place.

Besides, I'd never name my kid after a well known Greek philosopher, It'd be a really cool obscure one that only the cool cats would recognize.

I've been thinking about Parmenides. that whole name sounds awesome, but there's just no potential for a nickname. Maybe I could call him Thelonius Parmenides. Fav Jazz pianist + badass old school greek philosopher?

Conformity, as far as I can tell, is not unhealthy or unnatural. In fact, it is probably one of the most important developments in human evolutionary social growth. The simple fact is that conformity builds trust from others and comfort in ourselves.

Ask yourself this, why are you coming on to an internet forum asking people for the "coolest" philosopher names to apply to your child?

If I offend you, I'm sorry, its the internet and I can do so with little repercussion, but you sound like a high school kid who doesn't quite fit in and responds to this by doing everything he can to not conform.

Striving for non-conformity is no less an obsession with conformity than the people you mock for striving for normalcy.

Striving for non-conformity is also a form of conformity. You are conforming to the standards of the non-conformist, whether the non-conformist is aware or not.

A walking joke to whom? All of the stupid ignorant kids consumed with an unhealthy drive for normalcy and acceptance in a dissapointing society, who can't get past something as superficial as a name? And they would see him as a walking joke? I <3 the irony.

This is why I decided i'd give my kid a crazy name in the first place.

Besides, I'd never name my kid after a well known Greek philosopher, It'd be a really cool obscure one that only the cool cats would recognize.

I've been thinking about Parmenides. that whole name sounds awesome, but there's just no potential for a nickname. Maybe I could call him Thelonius Parmenides. Fav Jazz pianist + badass old school greek philosopher?

Well, you do have a slight responsibility as a parent to at least attempt to set your child up for success. Inviting all of the "stupid ignorant kids" (who run the school social scene) to crack jokes about his/her name is not going to help anything. There are better ways than this to instill self-esteem and self-reliance than just throwing the kid into the lions den with the hope that everything will turn out OK. (This reminds me of the country song, "A Boy Named Sue", you should listen to it).

Your child might not care for philosophy or philosophers at all; he/she might want to conform with those ignorant kids (most people do). Don't set the kid up with a difficult situation. You could give him/her a greek philosopher middle name, and at least the kid could then decide to use it, or not.

Thelonious is a cool name, I will agree, and Monk is my favorite jazz pianist...still, it might get your kid beat up!