Racist sex?

@sometime sun,

sometime sun;159389 wrote:

If i prefer my lovers to be white,
does this make me a racist?

Is not sexual arousal biological?
Can biology cancel out ethics?
Cancel out right and or wrong?
Is racism and or ethics biological?

Um, it depends on what your reasons behind your preference are that matters.

@sometime sun,

sometime sun;159389 wrote:

If i prefer my lovers to be white,
does this make me a racist?

Is not sexual arousal biological?
Can biology cancel out ethics?
Cancel out right and or wrong?
Is racism and or ethics biological?

Racism is discrimination based on race. Discrimination is unfair treatment based on prejudice. So, no this isn't an issue of prejudice. Prejudice is cognitive and emotions such as attraction aren't.

@sometime sun,

sometime sun;159389 wrote:

If i prefer my lovers to be white,
does this make me a racist?

Can biology cancel out ethics?

I would not think so, I think that it could be possible that if you were looking for a relationship and you met the right black person you very well could be swept of your feet by love.

Now if you believe that there is no possible way that you could be attracted to someone black out of love then you very well may be racist. I do realize that there needs to be a physical attraction but I have seen very attractive black people. havent you?[ maybe this is a man thing]

Could others also let me know if this applies to you if you are a woman? I do admit that they are far and few but not all white people are attractive to me neither. Smile

@sometime sun,

sometime sun;159389 wrote:

If i prefer my lovers to be white,
does this make me a racist?

No.

sometime sun;159389 wrote:

Is not sexual arousal biological?

Yes (and no).

sometime sun;159389 wrote:

Can biology cancel out ethics?
Cancel out right and or wrong?

No.

sometime sun;159389 wrote:

Is racism and or ethics biological?

No.

HTH. Very Happy

@sometime sun,

Sexual arousal is also psychological rather than only biological. To answer your question, maybe.

@Dosed,

Dosed.;159425 wrote:

Sexual arousal is also psychological rather than only biological. To answer your question, maybe.

Now the thing i dont understand is that most of my life my friends and true loves have all been foriegn.
Most of my friends English is their second language or their parents were not English or white.
I have always felt more at ease with other races and even nationalities than western whites, which may in itself be a little racist.
But i am not consciously choosing not to be close to them, it is usually that they do not choose me.
So why would i fancy that which i have least in common with less afinity?
I must also impress that when it comes to love i have no racial preference, i dont even care if they are fat as long as they can be loved and will love me back.
Even a smoker?

@sometime sun,

sometime sun;159389 wrote:

If i prefer my lovers to be white,
does this make me a racist?

Is not sexual arousal biological?
Can biology cancel out ethics?
Cancel out right and or wrong?
Is racism and or ethics biological?

I once had a girl friend who was black, and it is interesting to see your prejudices up close... I guess they are different about oral, and even different about tipping in a restaraunt... When I was young I worked at a pancake house and the waitresses all hated black customers because they all complained and never tipped...This girlfriend wouldn't let me tip either... She said: a smile don't get ****... And I suppose since black people have stand out smiles which no one gives them anything for, the smiles and attention of waitresses are worth nothing to them...They expect them with the price not realizing that the price of short wages do not cover the cost of living, if they care at all...

Any way... It did not work out, but I learned some things in the process, like how expensive and time consuming it can be to be black, so if I ever have a choice, I won't be black... But then, being a woman is pretty time consuming too... A girl can look fine to me and she is still an hour away from being ready...That is why I have put all my time and money on the inside of me: So I don't have to fix it, or replace it every time I take a bath...

@sometime sun,

sometime sun;159427 wrote:

Now the thing i dont understand is that most of my life my friends and true loves have all been foriegn.
Most of my friends English is their second language or their parents were not English or white.
I have always felt more at ease with other races and even nationalities than western whites, which may in itself be a little racist.
But i am not consciously choosing not to be close to them, it is usually that they do not choose me.
So why would i fancy that which i have least in common with less afinity?
I must also impress that when it comes to love i have no racial preference, i dont even care if they are fat as long as they can be loved and will love me back.
Even a smoker?

Wow Did you hear that Fido LOL [I must also impress that when it comes to love i have no racial preference, i dont even care if they are fat as long as they can be loved and will love me back.
Even a smoker] I wonder if you and fido would make a good couple if you are single:flowers::surrender: Please do not take this personally:bigsmile:

@reasoning logic,

reasoning logic;159430 wrote:

Wow Did you hear that Fido LOL [I must also impress that when it comes to love i have no racial preference, i dont even care if they are fat as long as they can be loved and will love me back.
Even a smoker] I wonder if you and fido would make a good couple if you are single:flowers::surrender: Please do not take this personally:bigsmile:

I am not taking it personally... I am not taking it at all...If one woman, even my run away wife is too much for me it is certain that another woman, even at long distance is too much relationship for me to bear... First of all, I am foresworn... My wife can release me, and I am honor bound to not give her good cause; but I cannot release me... In fact, just by sharing the situation here in this forum I have revealed too much, and dishonored myself... And I have to quit...

It is only that I don't know what to do, if I should do anything, and some of the people here are the nicest smartest people I don't actually know...LIke Lincoln said in regard to the British: one war at a time... Every woman deserves 100% of the effort of one man, his affection, his love, and his devotion... I might not have the relationship problems that I do if I had come any where near that figure... Thanks, and good night...

@sometime sun,

sometime sun;159427 wrote:

Even a smoker?

No not even a smoker.
I would try to help them quit though.

But it does make me wonder as to how much of love is conditional on the habitual?????

Can you really choose who you love?
And if so is someones habits a good basis for love?

@sometime sun,

i got to the point where i could choose who to love-but it didnt help, they were still the wrong people.

when it comes to affinity, there is a rule that opposites attract, but similarities also attract. i think both are good-some of each, i mean, in one partner.

strange what you said, sometime, because i also felt out of place in the white world-but i found out late in life that i am only partly white after all. so i had unconsciously always identified myself with hispanic and indian asian people-in america i only knew black people and white people, and found more in common with black people.

as far as beauty, i think white people are less beautiful. if you take any 20 white men and any 20 black or brown colored men i will have a hard time even finding one good looking white man or one not good looking brown or black man. i even have a mental picture of myself as being brown skinned-i dont know why people here look at me and know at once i am a foreigner. but lately they are beginning to think i am 'north indian' or kashmiri. funny thing is i am so many shades darker than my real color from being in the sun!

as far as temperament, i do find i am more similar to people who are not white, who i find on the whole less emotionally demonstrative...more inhibited. people are equal but they are not all the same. here i am not the crazy one.

if you look at the matrimonial ads, lots of people specify which race they want and lots of them are specifying a race other than their own.

hey, whatever works for you is good!

@salima,

Salima;
I think white women are generally the least beautiful amongst general women.
But all women are the most beautiful of all humans.
(Few men have ever suprised me)
What of the white male beauty?
I at this point in my words found i am not sure my definition of beauty has much to do with love.
When i know it ought and i know i do has many links between love and beauty.
So may have to correct myself by saying something about the aesthetics of beauty.
But i do not think my attraction and fancy and sex has necessarily anything much to do with love and or beauty?
But for beautifuly skin deep?

Is there more than one brand of 'beauty'?

@sometime sun,

sometime sun;159389 wrote:

If i prefer my lovers to be white,
does this make me a racist?

Is not sexual arousal biological?
Can biology cancel out ethics?
Cancel out right and or wrong?
Is racism and or ethics biological?

I suppose that's aesthetics rather than ethics.

@sometime sun,

Yeah, that's not racism. I'm the same way, I tend to find light skinned girls more attractive.. but this preference is no stronger than my tendency to find redheads more attractive than blonds.

Offtopic: But oh, if I ever met a fit dark-skinned girl with red hair.. I'd probably go after her just because I've never seen that combination before.

@sometime sun,

sometime sun;159728 wrote:

Salima;
I think white women are generally the least beautiful amongst general women.
But all women are the most beautiful of all humans.
(Few men have ever suprised me)
What of the white male beauty?
I at this point in my words found i am not sure my definition of beauty has much to do with love.
When i know it ought and i know i do has many links between love and beauty.
So may have to correct myself by saying something about the aesthetics of beauty.
But i do not think my attraction and fancy and sex has necessarily anything much to do with love and or beauty?
But for beautifuly skin deep?

Is there more than one brand of 'beauty'?

It could be that the votes of men count more with men, and they find power beautiful...

I was once beautiful, handsome and strong; I hope I have traded my share of beauty for understanding...If not, I have been robbed...

@sometime sun,

sometime sun;159389 wrote:

If i prefer my lovers to be white,
does this make me a racist?

Is not sexual arousal biological?
Can biology cancel out ethics?
Cancel out right and or wrong?
Is racism and or ethics biological?

It's a matter of curiosity whether sexual arousal is indeed somewhat biological, yet, on the most part, it seems Psychological. Your upbringing and experience would have lead to this particular preference.

Whether biology can cancel out ethics is interesting and will lead into the debate between Freewill and Determinism. If we are determined to act in a way by our genetics (biology) then in what sense can we have the freedom to act ethically? Indeed, determinism destroys our sense of morality completely.

However, ethically, there isn't anything wrong with your preferences. There cannot be an objective form of beauty. Beauty is subjective or 'in the eye of the beholder'. This ultimately means that there is no such thing as beauty and that it's just preference.

Everybody has preferences of this effect. I also lean towards white women. This is not to say that we are acting/judging in a discriminatory way. Similarly, one who prefers brunets to blondes is not being discriminatory. A homosexual man is not being sexist.

@sometime sun,

i might see beauty in anyone or any combination, but now i am speaking only of superficial beauty, the kind that doesnt even matter-but inner beauty is another thing, that shines through even an old hag. but there is another kind of beauty too, for instance i might actually think someone is ugly (and i have) and then fall in love with him (and i did) and then he became beautiful to me, absolutely transformed. that probably isnt actually beauty...it must be the love itself putting a veil over the eyes or something...

that fellow who sings the lead with the bullet boys, he was pretty cute for a white guy...

@salima,

salima;159975 wrote:

i might see beauty in anyone or any combination, but now i am speaking only of superficial beauty, the kind that doesnt even matter-but inner beauty is another thing, that shines through even an old hag. but there is another kind of beauty too, for instance i might actually think someone is ugly (and i have) and then fall in love with him (and i did) and then he became beautiful to me, absolutely transformed. that probably isnt actually beauty...it must be the love itself putting a veil over the eyes or something...

that fellow who sings the lead with the bullet boys, he was pretty cute for a white guy...

Ok, that's fair enough. However, beauty isn't objective. It's nothing more than opinion no matter how this opinion is found. Some people ill find one person beautiful but others will disagree. Some people like some traits of personality and others will disagree. There's dispute over any factor in any person ever that is claimed to be beauty. Therefore, when we speak of beauty we are speaking only of our opinions and not of objective truth.

@Fido,

Fido;159740 wrote:

It could be that the votes of men count more with men, and they find power beautiful...

I was once beautiful, handsome and strong; I hope I have traded my share of beauty for understanding...If not, I have been robbed...

Please expand on the power of men.

Can true beauty ever fade?
I dont think so.
Just the audience that fades, to much of a good thing.
Do we rate our own stats such as beauty, sexual appeal, strength, by how we are seen or how we view ourselves?
Surely beauty, sex and strength are self possessed more than in the possession of other?
I would say if any thing actually fades with time it is the ability to understand, so if yours is still growing you are indeed a blessed man.

---------- Post added 05-04-2010 at 05:51 PM ----------

Bill Maxwell;159980 wrote:

Ok, that's fair enough. However, beauty isn't objective. It's nothing more than opinion no matter how this opinion is found. Some people ill find one person beautiful but others will disagree. Some people like some traits of personality and others will disagree. There's dispute over any factor in any person ever that is claimed to be beauty. Therefore, when we speak of beauty we are speaking only of our opinions and not of objective truth.

May i just say welcome, it is good to have you aboard.
You may find this thread useful;http://www.philosophyforum.com/philosophy-forums/branches-philosophy/aesthetics/6466-beauty-truth.html

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