I think I'm crazy, in fact I know I don't think normally anymore, most people think simply on what they do and what they are going to do, their lives, their fantasies, and miscellaneous other things , I still do these things as I am human of coarse, as it is our nature to wish and dream of things bigger than ourselves. But I had a life changing experience which made me view things differently to a point where I can't 100% accept reality anymore, not in the suicidal sense, I just can't be sure that I am what I i think I am. I think I am crazy, which in a sense is true, but something tells me that it's OK to be crazy as long as you know it, Now that I have told you what I think that I know about myself I'll tell you what I have experienced.

I recently started thinking about life and death in quiet moments more often then I did, my father once told me, in the span of the universe our knowledge of it will measure to the equivalent of attempting to teach an ant to use a super computer. We know nothing, we rarely think about the universe and what it is, but it is more real than anything else, its the great mystery of existence, that we will more than likely never know or comprehend. We live on a speck of dust equivalent to a grain of sand on the earth. I wonder what really happened "In the beginning" was there really nothing? Would it be possible? We don't know. We don't know if there is anything beyond this place we call reality, light can only travel so fast to show us what there is. I wonder if there is something beyond death, but the simple fact is we don't know. We don't know a lot of things, and that's why I question things I take as facts as well.

I think that I am a conscious being, because I think, but I don't know. I hope that every other human is a conscious being, but as much as you tell me that you think and you reason and discuss with me everything that you think you know, the simple fact is that I don't. I think that everyone else is a conscious being but I don't know, it's as simple as that. In my opinion I don't think there are facts, I think there are things that we think we know, such as that you were once young, and you grew older and you are presently where you are now, but the present never stays the same.

I think Religion is the thing we as people cling to, to give life meaning and some people will tell you that they know that there is a God, and others will tell you they know there isn't a God. I personally think after my experience that there is a God, I don't know what it is, but my completely fabricated theory on the matter is that God is existence, God is reality, everything, and I think that there is a Consciousness behind everything. In a sense karma, things that you do to other will affect you, even if it isn't immediate. I think the most relate-able Religion I look on when I think these things is Christianity, namely that you are part of the body of Christ and that Christ is everywhere. Believing is all you can do in life, knowing shouldn't be a word.

I'm interested to hear what people have to say, I'm creating a new alias to post this on the internet, so I can still use my normal name without being called crazy or being ridiculed.


I understand that my ideas aren't completely organized but I just wanted to see what other think.