Now missing - the story of the man I tried to save

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Reply Thu 4 Nov, 2021 10:23 pm
In August of 2020 I began to fall in love with a sweet blue eyed man in the greater Phoenix, AZ area. Unknown to me at the time, this man was born and raised in The Family. We became engaged in early 2021. Let's call him Duke (not his real name). This is our story:

After becoming engaged to Duke in early 2021, I began to recognize dysfunction within his immediate family and also signs that he was a victim of sex trafficking and childhood abuse. He was very thin we first met, hardly ate anything and often complained of digestive issues. He smoked an e-cigarette heavily. He was sweet, sad and had a very codependent personality. He often exhibited behaviors of some level of sociopathy as well. As we fell in love, I showed him a new perspective on life that he had never experienced before. I offered him unconditional love, friendship and most importantly: empathy and forgiveness. He was troubled, too reliant on his mothers approval and guidance. In addition to his unusually codependent relationship with his mother, he was heartbroken by his ex-girlfriend, yet he couldn't seem to refuse her every wish and order of him. He acted like a slave to the people in his life.

I slowly began to empower him through our friendship by sharing my self-healing and trauma informed perspective. I educated him about narcissistic abuse, before me, he had never even heard the term narcissist before. I helped him relate the cycle of narcissistic abuse to his own family's dynamic. This is when things suddenly began to take a dark turn.

I had discovered that he had partitioned his hard drive on his computer. He was hiding something on it. I became concerned. My own trauma and intuition led me to believe he was hiding child pornography on his computer. When I confronted him about the partitioned hard drive, he began to gaslight me. With hard evidence right in front of us on the computer screen: he denied that he partitioned the hard drive. His mother suddenly became very volatile towards me. His older brother began to court me through phone calls. Then, Duke finally admitted to me that he had been a "male escort" since before he was 18. I was very accepting of his bisexuality, and even his tendency to sell his body to men long before I recognized that he had been selling his body to men as a minor. That's when I started to ask more questions about his childhood. The more questions I asked about his past, the more dangerous our relationship became. Slowly, one confession at a time, I began to unravel the dark family secrets he was hiding. First he admitted to me that he stopped attending school in the 7th grade due to his mother believing that school was giving him a "bad attitude." At 12, he was forced to work to help provide for the family instead. Then he admitted to me that at 14 he became highly addicted to online porn, including some very dark categories like rape, sex with animals, and eventually child porn. This is around the time his family began to heavily push us both to start attending their Christian church with them. I refused because I've never been a fan of religion. He refused as well, and began to tell me how his family has used religion to emotionally manipulate him and cover up their abusive behaviors his whole life. That's when I first recognized that he was a victim of cultic practices. After that, his confessions and memories of his childhood came spilling out. He said that he had been raped by his older brothers his whole life. The he had sex with older sister as well, even fathering a child with her. That he had been offered sex with his own mother, usually as a form of reward and fathered a son with his mother as well. He was forced a young child to have sex with other children and toddlers. That anytime he attempted to seek help or told anyone about the sexual abuse, he would be physically beaten. I once overheard a conversation with his older brother where his older brother recounted a memory of them having to perform oral sex on their step father. Finally, he admitted to me that he was born addicted to meth and his mother/brothers had been giving him meth his entire life. He also mentioned having to attend "church camps" where he once had to have sex with a 9 year old girls dead body, kidnap a 12 yo girl (in the process, breaking her leg), that he had raped a cat to death and physically injured his incest born son/brother by forcing his genitals into the infants mouth.

While this was all coming to light, him and I both began to seek help. He confessed to our local police department that he had been drugging, molesting and stalking me and my 7yo son. The police did nothing about it, they didn't even offer me a domestic violence shelter. My social security was stolen, and when I tried to apply for unemployment benefits, the system told me my information was being used to claim wages in the state of Oregon. I had never been to Oregon and was unemployed due to covid. Around this time, my social media and email accounts were getting hacked. Passwords were being changed, and my accounts were logged in on multiple unknown devices in different locations across the U.S. Duke and I both decided to try and escape. We bought an RV, and after us both being raped and threatened by a man with a knife, we packed up and left one day. We drove to New Mexico where Duke and I both made statements to the Attorney General's office. After making statements to the AG, we returned to our RV where we were yet again both threatened, drugged and raped by strangers. Then we were coerced to go to Colorado, where Duke began to force me into sex trafficking myself while he watched.

On his 30th birthday, Duke made his final confession to me; that my ex, the father of my son, was part of the cult as well and that Duke and his mother were under orders to make me suicidal and/or appear schizophrenic so my ex would win our custody battle. After a physical altercation with Duke, I escaped and sought help from a crisis center in Denver. I am now currently in a safe living situation, and due to Dukes confessions to law enforcement; I have not been labeled schizophrenic. I also refuse to kill myself. I refuse to let this evil family win.

Duke is now missing and there are some investigations underway to try and locate him.

I have deep discomfort with some of the Detectives working on our case and reason to believe that law enforcement in the greater Phoenix area of AZ is corrupt.

I also struggle daily with my feelings for Duke. I love him deeply, and empathize with the fact that he would not be the person he was had he been raised in a healthy family. By showing him just a little bit of love, forgiveness and consideration I was able to earn his love in return. That's why he made statements and confessions to law enforcement; to save me and my son. He tried to do the right thing. On the other hand, he was playing both sides. While making confessions to law enforcement he was also following orders from his mother to emotionally and psychologically torment me. Every time I bought a new phone as an attempt to get away from the cults control, he would send his mother the IMEI for the phone which would be used to stalk me. He admitted to me that every time he would follow his mother's orders that he would receive child porn of his incest born children as a reward. I can't help but feel empathy for that aspect too. I know the pain of being separated from your child, the willingness to do anything just to see them one more time.

It's just all so heartbreaking. I worry that Duke and I will never see justice. I know I am one of thousands of women who are victims to this system. When will it ever end? How has it managed to become so large and well hidden? It's a giant criminal enterprise, ruining people's lives and it operates in plain sight. It's as incredible as it is terrible. The secret holocaust.

I wish I could connect with other survivors, freedom fighters. I've met survivors from The Family but most of them are usually too far gone and dangerous to be around. If you're out there and you still have hope: please share it with me.

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