Of course they do. We evolved to be altruistic, some more than others. Our genes may be "selfish" but that doesn't make us selfish. We'll be annoyed if they are ungrateful, but that doesn't mean we won't do it.

I understand what you mean here but even if we evolved to be altruistic, isn't just something we do thinking of how it could benefit us in the future?
What I mean here is really, does anyone do something for someone without expecting any benefits in the long-run? This would mean no one truely gives without expecting something in return...

What pushes us to make sacrifices for others?

When this happens, its generally because we want to; perhaps it makes us feel good to help someone else feel good. There's often a genuine joy in seeing joy in others when we're the 'cause' of that happiness.

DrFunk;161800 wrote:

... why do we force ourselves to do something for someone in order to help them/ make them happy?

If someone's forcing themselves to do something for someone else, I don't think that'd fall into any kind of altruistic category. Truth be told, I'm not sure how exactly that'd work.

DrFunk;161800 wrote:

Do we do it expecting something in return? If so, then this would seem very immoral and selfish.

I think so; whether it be that warm fuzzy, a desire to see someone happy or some other, more specific reason. In any case, there is a "self interest" element to any kind of giving - that's undeniable - but I don't think I'd couch it as immoral at all. Let me counter ask this: If I do a good thing for the wrong reason, was it still a good thing? Answer: Of course it was, if my motivation was flawed, wrong, bad or immoral, the external 'event' that we've already defined as "good" remains so. A bad motive can taint the goodness brought, but we're sliding into extremes here. I believe most self-interested acts of giving are, on the whole, still good things.

DrFunk;161800 wrote:

Why do we accept to suffer to make someone's life better? ... We often make sacrifices because we are scared to be pointed out by others as egocentric. We are scared of what others would think of us if we didn't lend them a hand.

What you're describing here probably does come into play often. But where that's the case, someone is allowing their perceived impression on others to dictate what they do. Perceptions are a normal part of our lives, and we all are (to some greater or lesser extent) subject to them. But that's a far cry from saying they "rule" us - we do have a choice. I think here its important to know oneself enough to understand our own motivations and pitfalls, so as to avoid doing something out of some sense of perceived obligation.

DrFunk;161800 wrote:

The only real reason I can find is the very selfish one which would consist of waiting for something in return of the favor/ sacrifice we have given.

Sure... again, this is something that takes place a good deal. The only thing I'd like to add in communicating my understanding of these processes is this: I believe we are a species of perceived necessity - that we gravitate towards those people (and seek their company, companionship or other kinds of interaction) based on what we, internally, believe they can or will do for us. Perhaps being around them makes us feel good, maybe we have other designs (such as long term friendship or romance). In either case, its still a subconscious decision on the part of the doer that sees what they believe this other person might do or be for them. Yes, this carries a twinge of selfishness; So what. We've been working that way for millions of years (as do bugs, mice, your average goat and virtually every other animal). This Selfish element needs only be mitigated when that person seen only or predominantly as a means towards something else. If I love my wife because I treasure her company, am I therefore a selfish, self-interested dolt? See what I mean?

Self-interest is a part of our behavior that needs reigning in when objectification outgrows respect - not to be vilified as always a horrid monster. Of course, I say this conceding that it's just my view - your mileage may vary.

DrFunk;161800 wrote:

Do people who give without expecting anything in return really exist?

Consciously? Sure!

Subconsciously (or as a part of other perceived element of self interest)? No, probably not.

Again, I'd say whether there's an element of self interest is no reason to condemn one and deify the other. It's the level of usery, objectification or malicious-intent that - in my book - plays the biggest part in what is or isn't immoral giving.

Thanks

Hi all,
I was wondering if anyone could help me puzzle out something that I thought of today when being exposed to this kind of situation. What pushes us to make sacrifices for others? As little as they are, why do we force ourselves to do something for someone in order to help them/ make them happy? Does it bring us guaranteed satisfaction? Do we do it expecting something in return? If so, then this would seem very immoral and selfish.

Why do we accept to suffer to make someone's life better? It could just be lending a certain amount of money to a friend like it could be risking your own life for someone... We often make sacrifices because we are scared to be pointed out by others as egocentric. We are scared of what others would think of us if we didn't lend them a hand.

The only real reason I can find is the very selfish one which would consist of waiting for something in return of the favor/ sacrifice we have given.

Do people who give without expecting anything in return really exist? I'd like to know your opinion on this and discuss a bit further on the topic!

What pushes us to make sacrifices for others? As little as they are, why do we force ourselves to do something for someone in order to help them/ make them happy?

Hi all,
I was wondering if anyone could help me puzzle out something that I thought of today when being exposed to this kind of situation. What pushes us to make sacrifices for others? As little as they are, why do we force ourselves to do something for someone in order to help them/ make them happy? Does it bring us guaranteed satisfaction? Do we do it expecting something in return? If so, then this would seem very immoral and selfish.

My reasons for making sacrifices and helping others are primarily for self, I do it because it feels good. It builds my esteem as well as my ego. I feel better when I see someone benefit from my sacrifice. I define this as living for self, unselfishly.

When you act for Love of Self, there is a personal gratification in most cases. Ignorance can botch that plan every time. However, nothing else benefits.

When you act for Love of All, there is still the personal gratification but every time it is accompanied by the Good it creates in the Universe, which is never present when action is taken for Love of Self beyond Necessity.

But I do like the Unselfishly Selfish life.

I like the concept you are expressing, however ,I wonder how many can honestly prevent their right hand from seeing what the left hand is doing.
It's nigh well impossible to create good in the universe without feeling good about it, thus enter SELF.

the closest thing in my experience in doing something for someone other than self without expecting anything in return, either consciously or subconsciously, would be the instincts of a mother (and maybe fathers have them, but i was never a father so i cant verify that). but at the same time, i think there is a loss of self in the process, or an extension to believing the other (child) is the self...and this could become extended to the entire human race, but it is confusing .

The Gift (1924) by Marcel Mauss seems relevant here. It's a classic of French sociology. I have not read it yet but it looks very interesting.

The Gift (book) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia